15 September 2006, 10:00 PM : friday` i love u dear . muackks . writes:
on friday i CRIED larhhs . 2nd time i cried in school ? yarhhs yarhhs . tis time i cried in np room . supposing wanttu be alone , so i wenttu the staircase thr . but nvr didd i noe thtt seb wil walk down . den i said hi , and he say thtt why am i alone , why i look so sad . den i jus say , nthh larhhs . den i walk away . i went up to derhhs second floor , and sat thr . wantedd to hab some time to tinkk . den i sat thr , tinking ; tinking ; tinking ;; till i heard footsteps . and i look up and saw it was seb and my feizhhu . actuali , im n0t shocked to see them larhhs . cus i n0e thtt seb wil surely ask feizhu whtt happenedd to me derhhs . den yarhhs lohhs . but im so stupid larhhs . i noe thtt feizhu cme find me is bcus he is worry bout me . yet i jus stood up and say nthh wrong with me , and walkedd off . im so stupid larhhs . den feizhu and seb was gone for a moment . tink feizhu wenttu eat . im not awared and he nvr say . so nvm lohhs . den i stayed in np room , helpin grace with the master parade paperworks . after thtt , feiizhu came back in . den i walkk out of the room . i dunno whtt happenedd t0 me . i justt culdntt get myself t0 face him . den i came back t0 the r0om , i sat thr al0ne on the sofa , staringg int0 the space . everione hadd changedd into their uniform . then feizhu cme sit nxttu me . tears justt fl0w d0wn vig0r0usly by itself . he put his arms arndd my shoulders , askingg me if im alrighht ; whtt happenedd to me . i couldntt let the words to describe whtt happenedd to me . but stil , he have his way to get me spoken . he huggedd me and sayy smthh . *somethingg whichh i realli couldntt st0p tears frm fl0wingg . he sat nxttu me in his uniform andd accompaniedd me . but , the worst tinkk is i swayy his handds away . without complains , without gettingg madd , he put his arms arndd my shoulder agn . tryingg hardd to gett me to speakk . i grabbedd hold on his hand real tighht . he holdd mine as tighht as he couldd t0o . andd i startedd cryingg agn . i t0ttu myself thtt i couldd nvr hold his handds liddat anym0re . but my nerves in my mindd wasnt righht . i let go off his handd . i dun understandd whtt im doingg . but , he immediately grabb my handd agn . tis time , i couldnt get my handd out . andd im relievedd thtt he is grabbingg my handd tighht , not lettingg it off . suddenly , i felt so lovedd . meanwhile , the girls gatheredd arndd me andd him . askingg if im alrighht . and the worst of all is thtt feizhu kept stuffingg tissues to me ; my nose g0t blockkedd andd i couldntt even breathe . haiishh . after a while , feizhu realii g0ttu g0 andd get the cadetts ready , andd i nidd to get changedd . after askingg the others to leave , other den the girls , i sit up . my eyes felt pain . andd i look damn ugly can . den i wenttu toliet withh grace as she is not changedd yet . andd i found outt thtt i forgettu bring my skirt to sk0ol . after grace changedd , we wenttu the np room . andd get a skirt andd i changedd in thr . after changingg , the other girls cme in . i realisedd thtt im smilingg andd laughingg once agn . i felt so relaxed after a bigg cry . and the girls ROCKS ~ (: then is master parade . alright the sec1s was likk tokingg all the while . as im standdingg infrnt of the sec3s , i turnedd behindd looking at derhhs sec1s , andd i jus couldntt stop scoldingg them larhhs . andd i totally turnedd insane . heyys . guess whtt ? i g0tten my sergeant ! ! andd my name was the last one to be called . i felt so nervous larhhs . and mr azahar usedd the term . "last but not least" who wil not get nervous ? after master parade . we hadd trainingg . heyys . it was the best ever trainingg i hadd withh the sec2s . well . it is the most memorable one . l0ls . at first im suppose to be withh the sec1s . den dunno who say me extra . den i go to derhhs sec2s . withh seb andd feiizhu ~ (: i love my boy ! ! hmms . den we endd up playingg withh them . l0ls . ab0utt mdms sirs . tinkks . readd it PROPERLY ! ! l0ls . dun pronouce it as menses pls . l0ls ! andd it was realii an enjoyable day . if i dintt get the tears outt of me , i guess , im stil typingg those sadd sadd entry now . l0ls . i felt so relievedd after thtt cry . everytinkk seems to be better . after trainingg , we hadd debrief . after it , feizhu get me the box of cookies he brought frm the gal guides . and i sat thr eat likk a lil gal larhhs . derhhs way i sit , the way i eat . ): andd they were likk rushingg me to get outta the room . l0ls . i eat damn slow larhhs . l0ls . den feizhu accompaniedd me to eat . den i kept looking at derhhs reflection frm the glass larhhs . l0ls . andd feiizhu hugged me . as usual larhhs . den he saidd thtt very longg nvr hugg me . den i say now den u noe arhhs . perviously manii tinkks happenedd . but luckily , now . everythinkk is ALRIGHT~ weee~ den we wenttu our secret place . . l0ls . till 8.30 liddat jiu go hme lia0s . i miss him ~ i LOVE you darlingg . (:
backk to todayy , my phone cnnt be on ! ! sadd . . ): anyone got extra phone to lendd ? ? haiishh . andd kelvin tells me thtt he got me a top-up card . i felt so shocked larhhs . i saidd no nidd , yet he brought it . -.- heyys babe , i'll save up andd return u the money . thnkks anws . n0w thtt , i can msg , but my phone bu zhen qi . ): l0ls .
cia0s~
